Hate is a strong word. There is not much that I would say "I hate . . ." But one of those things is waking up wide awake at 3:30am, unless I am leaving for fishing at 4am. Here I am, 3:30am, wide awake. Its probably the sausage on a stick from the high school football game. 6-man football, final score 59-38. Probably a low score in some 6-man districts. Just about halftime, they fired up the grill and started cooking foot-long sausages. The wind carried the aroma up to the stands. Wasn't long before we were watching the grill instead of the game. "What is that we're smelling? I have to check that out at halftime." I did. Now I'm here.
With waking up, the brain gets turned on. When you are doing nothing, how do you know when you are finished? I have always wondered that. Seems like when you start to do something then nothing is finished. But not always. Sometimes I wonder what nothing was about. Was there a lesson that was supposed to be learned? Had I learned the lesson sooner, would nothing have ended sooner? I was discussing my situation with a friend yesterday and told him that he has only followed our story for the past year. This transition has lasted at least 4 years, possibly six. In that time I have been unemployed 4 times. Am I just a bad judge of "good opportunity" or is there something more at work here? I got involved in helping start-up hospices doing marketing and administration. I helped to build some really good teams. Now many of the people I helped train are doing well and I am out of the industry. What does that mean? In this transition period, I have downsized my household effects, had to sell my house, spent all of my savings, paid for 2 weddings, drained the retirement account. I have very little left to lose. Is there a lesson here? Or do things just happen for no reason? Does there have to be a reason?
The well-meant Christian cliches are mind-boggling. "God never puts on us more than we can handle." I asked God once "Just how much can I take?" I found out and I don't ask that question anymore. But saying that God causes everything that happens to me seems to be a stretch. "God has a purpose in putting you through this." Really? What is it? Can I know now or is that reserved for when I get to heaven? "You must have done something for which you need to repent." So, I brought this on myself? Read Job's story. He was a righteous man that Satan wanted to mess with. There was nothing in the story that indicates that Job deserved what he got. "You just need to trust God more and believe that He will bring you out of this." There are those in scripture who found themselves in dire straits that did not come out of them. Read about Stephen or John the Baptist. However, there is truth to this statement. It is about trust. And that is what faith is about. All God asks of us is to "trust me." The lesson of scripture is that God is faithful. By following Christ, I am asked to trust him. Whatever happens, faith can stay intact and God can be trusted.
And that brings me to the lesson of nothing. When looking for meaningful employment and nothing seems to happen, God is always the same. When faced with mounting debt and not enough income to pay those debts, God hasn't changed. The variables are mine; God is constant. He knows what I need before I ask but He still wants me to ask. Trust is in the asking. I am not dependent on myself to provide for all of my needs; I am dependent on God. What He asks of me is to be faithful to my decision to trust Him. Times of trial and stress bring me back to the point of trust. Why is it that times of blessing and plenty don't always lead back to trust? Had I never known what it was to have need, would trusting God develop on its own? What do you think?
As for the sausage on a stick, I think we discussed that before you ate it. Enough said.
ReplyDelete"Nothing from nothing leaves nothing." But the rest of the lyrics don't apply to us. We have, at times, found contentment in nothing and sometimes in something. The human mind seems to have difficulty with 'nothing.' Mine always seems to be somewhere, --what I should be doing, --what I'd like to be doing, etc. So, what is 'doing nothing?' Sitting with idle hands?
In blessing or plenty, want and need, trusting God is always a choice. We could choose to be self-trusting when in times of plenty, or thankful. ...arrogant when blessed or give God praise. So, does it also hold that in times of need we can choose to trust God for the solution or become hardened toward him? So, perhaps it IS the realization of my need for him that leads to the development of my trust in him. For even in the times of plenty or blessings of good health, etc., my realization that all good things come from God is also developing my faith.
"Every good and perfect gift is from above, coming down from the Father of the heavenly lights, who does not change like shifting shadows." James 1:17
God's goodness has nothing to do with my circumstances. But my faith has everything to do with how I respond to my circumstances. Recently, I've been reminded over and over that the important part of this life is not what we think is important. My focus seems to drift to the things that fade and that in the end won't mean much. What matters is that which will last forever: God and people.
ReplyDeleteThe female mind has trouble with nothing. The male mind is perfectly content with nothing going on.
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